wait did you say....

This week I went back to work and I had mixed emotions. I wanted things to be back to a normal routine but I also enjoyed working in my PJ’s alone while I listened to music throughout the day.  There were days I would stare out the window and just watch God’s creation from the blue skies, to swaying trees to a LOUD chirping bird family right outside the window.  I also had days where I would sit with the blinds closed and in the dark with nothing but a lamp beside me as I became so engulfed in my work. Oddly enough after about 2 weeks in I don’t think I ever turned my television on (weird I know!)   On Monday I went to the doctor for my release to come back to work (and to drive) and she said it was healing for sure but I still needed to wear my boot to work, or if I planned on being on it for an extended amount of time.  I also needed to schedule my appointments for physical therapy…..  Wait did you say physical therapy??  I am healing I thought and I can drive again so why would I need another co-pay service to help me further along.  I looked up the definition of physical therapy and it says;

Physical therapy:  the treatment of disease, injury, or disability by physical and mechanical means (as MASSAGE, regulated exercise, water, light, heat, and electricity)

Basically all I pulled from the definition is that I need a massage (kidding).  I noticed the word treatment and it is defined-b: the techniques or actions customarily applied in a specified situation. For people who want a different color hairstyle they have to undergo a treatment to get that desired color. Or if you are a star and desire “Star” treatment  the people surrounding you would apply certain techniques that make that person feel special and above everyone else.  The word treatment goes from hair color to as far as a star in Hollywood.  I asked God what in the world He was trying to teach me and He said this. 

Galatians 5:22/23 But the fruit of the spirit is LOVE, JOY, PEACE,PATIENCE,KINDNESS,GOODNESS, FAITHFULNESS, GENTLENESS, SELF CONTROL against such things there is no law.

I have grown up memorizing these fruits but never before has God directly taken each word and pressed them against my heart.  I could feel Him asking me this morning how is your Joy? How is your Kindness?   We are to walk in the spirit and yet we often go to church and continue in our deliberate sin. We are to walk in the spirit and yet we never open up His word. We are to walk in the spirit and yet as soon as an uncontrollable circumstance arises we see that our trust is way off kilter.  God wants to pour His love into ours so that from that intimacy His LOVE blooms in us.  When I start these physical therapy sessions I know that he/she will hurt me because they will be stretching my ankle beyond my capacity but in the process it will be strengthening the very ligaments and muscles that are torn.  Our hearts are no different.  No matter how we desire to see God bring about change in our lives we have to walk closely to Him even when His goodness shines on the dark and ugly places of our hearts.  In the long run our hearts will be strengthened and self-control will bloom.   I believe we have to step back and look  where our hearts are rooted.  Is it rooted in finances? Ministry? Future? Broken dreams? Desire  or passion? Ugly past? Consuming fear? Crippling insecurities? Job? Weight?  How can the fruits of the spirit bloom within our hearts and flow into our daily lives if we are allowing such things within our hearts to shape, mold and lead us?   God chose to die for you and for me and He poured out a limitless amount of mercy, grace and love all over those areas in our lives  so we could have beautiful fruit bloom once again.  Redemption is a beautiful thing its time we embraced it. 

Holly